A guideline on how to support your partner after surgery
by Northern Life
Surgery can create tension in a relationship, but you can decrease the strain
Recovering after surgery is stressful enough, but what about how this impacts your relationship with your partner? Can you handle the tension? Do you think you can stop the arguments caused by the pain and stress? Can you transform the healing period into something that will bring you closer together?
When your partner suffers an accident that requires surgery, you’re both experiencing a challenging time. Watching them go through medical intervention and recovery can be difficult because you don’t know how to help them regain their strength and mobility. However, you’re aware that their well-being is crucial in the process, and you must play an active part. You need to find ways to inspire and encourage them to go through the recovery process without losing hope.
Here are some recommendations on how to show your partner that you support and love them unconditionally during their recovery.
Release them of some responsibilities.
If you live together in the same house, you might have split the house chores between the two of you. However, it might be quite challenging for them to keep up with the established responsibilities after an accident and surgery. They might not even be able to do some of them because their injuries prevent them from making any kind of effort.
A practical way to show them you support them during recovery is to do the things they cannot do without waiting for them to ask you. Even small things can go a long way when they’re sick. If they usually take the dog for park walks, you can switch places and do it. You can also cook meals, clean the house, or do groceries. Suppose you cannot handle everything on your own, don’t be afraid to ask your loved ones to help.
When you take over the responsibilities that will exhaust them, you allow them to rest and focus on recovery.
Find hobbies you can still do together.
Most people become sad and anxious after surgery because they have to spend an extended period in bed. They are also angry at those at fault for their accident. In case someone’s negligence caused their accident, you can help them find peace by hiring a personal injury lawyer to claim compensation for them. You can find more information about the process at Personal Injury Claims UK.
Another way to help them cope with this period is to focus on the things they can accomplish while resting their body. Go through your hobbies and find the ones you can still engage in, even if they’re recovering. Some relaxing activities can help them relax and give you opportunities to communicate, cooperate, and spend quality time together. Only because their mobility is limited doesn’t mean you cannot make memories.
Discuss your interests, and make a list of things you want to do together. You can make a puzzle, learn some new skills, watch a multi-part movie franchise, go on walks, paint, or cook together. It all depends on their physical health and level of pain.
Discuss openly about intimacy.
Regardless if you’re just dating or in a serious relationship, it can be challenging and awkward to discuss intimacy, sex, and sensuality with your partner. Studies show that one-third of adults don’t feel comfortable talking about sex with their partner, and many don’t even bring up the subject in their relationships.
In case you didn’t approach the subject before, it might be even more difficult to have this conversation with them now, when they’re in pain and dealing with the aftermath of the surgery. However, everyone has the right to feel loved, and discussing how their health issues will impact your connection and intimacy is crucial. In some people, sensuality raises endorphin and oxytocin levels, and this can even help them deal with post-surgery symptoms.
Consider what intimacy means for you and share your expectations with your partner. If you don’t know what intimacy means for different people, you can research online to understand different individuals’ love languages.
Change your diet.
Healthy food supports recovery, so you should help your partner stick to nutritious aliments during this period. After suffering an accident and going through surgery, they might seek comfort in unhealthy foods, as they’re often more tasty than healthy foods. But unfortunately, they lack the vitamins, minerals, and nutrients human bodies need to recover and repair tissue. When the body is healing, it needs nutritious foods and plenty of fluids.
You can transform cooking and eating into activities that bring you closer together during this period. If your partner feels strong enough to help you in the kitchen, you can plan and cook meals together. If, on the other hand, they cannot leave bed, you can cook for them to motivate them to eat healthily. Prepare their favourite meals, but use only natural ingredients and don’t forget to encourage them to eat vegetables and fruits.
Spend time alone.
Suppose you have children or are living with other family members, it’s crucial to plan some time alone alone to maintain the connection between you two. Even if you think making time for a date is impossible, it can do wonders during your partner’s recovery. You should plan a romantic night once a week, or every two weeks, when you spend a couple of hours doing something you both enjoy or just having dinner.
Besides planning a date for the two of you, you also need some you-time. Spending all your time together can get overwhelming and uncomfortable, and you can end up feeling anxious around each other. So, while you offer your support to your partner, don’t neglect spending some time with your friends or on your own. Do something you enjoy alone, like reading, having a bubble bath, or hitting the gym. Your energy levels will rise, and you’ll feel better.
Be patient during this period because recovery takes time. Your partner has to regain their physical strength but also work on their mental health because accidents and medical interventions are stressful.